I didn’t have many expectations for 2019.
I had a rough 2018. I mean…on top of everything else I was dealing with. Because I needed more crap in my life.
I went into 2019 with low expectations.
2019 was a year of change though I have felt stagnant in many areas. I hope to see more movement in 2020.
Maybe 2019 was a little rough at time but I am not wishing that the door hits it on the way out.
What 2019 meant to me-
Change. If there was one word to sum up the year 2019, it would be “change.” Everything changed. The changes will continue into 2020 and beyond.
Growth. 2019 has been a year of growth, especially with all this change. I have learned a lot about myself this year and plan on continuing. I have also watched my daughter grow since she started kindergarten. The downside of growth is that I have a lot of wounds in my life revealed to me but those wounds will make me stronger.
Friendship. 2019 was a year of revelations on friendship. I was burned by some close friends in 2018. I was hurt and angry. Some of it still doesn’t make sense but I had to learn that people believe what they want to believe, even if it is false. I am no longer angry at those people. I wish them the best in their lives and for all the happiness. We just won’t play a role in each others life. It took me a while to feel safe letting others in but those who are in my life now have proved that friendships still exists. Friends who love me for me and I love them for being them. I will continue to cherish those friends.
2019 was a year when phoniness was exposed and it was a time to be Real. I hope I am better at seeing through phony people Maybe I am kidding myself.
2019 was a year where I had to learn the balance between remembering and letting go. I know I need to keep moving forward but with every step forward I take, I have to let go of Bryon and that still hurts. A lot.
What is in store for 2020?
Do we really know?
I definitely think there will be more change and growth. I also hope there will be continued friendship. I look forward to seeing my daughter grow. I plan to put some energy into my self care and self love.
Look for those topics on the blog.