What are we so afraid of?

What is with all the fear?

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There is a lot of be afraid of.

As we all know, there this virus going around.  And that virus has the potential to kill you.

And it seems like every day the news changing it’s story about the virus.  And as each day passes, the headlines become scarier.  And the messages are mixed.  Can anyone keep any of it straight anymore?

We fear for our health and we fear for our livelihoods.

And now it looks like 2020 is going to be the worst hurricane season ever.

And just when things couldn’t get any worse, we now have “Murder Hornets”.

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No wonder why we are scared.  Hurricanes are scary.  Any kind of flying insect with a stinger is scary, even those without the word “murder” in their name.

But have we stopped and asked us why we are so scared.

My daughter is scared of bugs.  It doesn’t matter what kind of bug.  She’s even afraid of ants.

I am not going to lie.  I don’t love bugs.  They make me uncomfortable.  But I deal with them.

My daughter is also afraid of various Disney villains and she is afraid of the dark.

I fear oompa loompas.  They make me extremely uncomfortable and totally give me the heebie jeebies.   Bryon enjoyed scaring me with that one.  One time when I was in the bathroom, he took my phone and changed my wallpaper to a picture of an oompa loompa.  So poor, unsuspecting me picked up my phone and saw that. I screamed.  I then put a lock on my screen.

There is a lot of things in this world to be afraid of.  And quarantine and the news and all the certainty is exacerbating our fears.

To be clear- I am not telling you to not to be concerned about the virus.  Your level of concern is up to you to assess and decide what your level of fear is.  Especially since I can’t write a post that is perfectly tailored to be perfectly applicable to everyone.  If you live in a place that is a COVID-19 hotspot, then you are going to be more fearful of catching it than someone who is not in a COVID-19 hotspot.

As the writer of this blog post, I have to trust you, the reader, to make your own decision about your feelings.  And that is how it should be.  As the reader, you need to take from this blog post what resonates with you and leave what doesn’t resonate.  Partially resonating is cool too.

One thing I do not talk about on this blog much is the fact that I am more into New Age thinking.  I don’t talk about it because I fear what people may think of me.  It’s not what Catholics do.  But I have issues with Catholicism and all organized religion at the moment.  But I will be clear, while I may roll my eyes at some of the hypocrisy I see, I am not an Atheist.  But this is all for another post at another time.

So try to follow me.  I am more New Agey now.  I do believe we are all energy.  The cool thing is that since we are all energy, we never truly die, which I know because I feel Bryon’s energy at time.  I keep my beliefs to myself because I am fearful of what people will think of them. Which is stupid.

Most of us have probably felt or been recipients to positive energy and negative energy.

The emotions we feel have energy.

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The energy we have affects ourselves and those around us.  Our energy can also be affected by those around us.  Raising your energy is your responsibility but it will help out those around you as well.

At the very least, people won’t be saying you are a bitch when you leave the room.

I kid.  I am sure if you are great and those people were blaming you and resorting to name calling.  I got your back.

If you notice on the bottom, there are contracted energy.  Emotions like Shame, Guilt, Apathy, Grief and Fear are all contracted energy.  We are not living to our fullest potential when we are in those emotions.

Let’s quickly go up the scale.

Shame.  The lowest energy.

I did a lot of soul searching after Bryon died.  I stumbled on this Ted Talk with Brene Brown and it changed my life.

 

Watch it.  It may change your life.

I then wanted to read every book Brene Brown wrote.  I started with The Gifts of Imperfection: Let Go of Who You Think You’re Supposed to Be and Embrace Who You Are.  The link is an Amazon Affiliate link.  I read alot and I have always been afraid to make money with book recommendations.  It’s silly.  Why should I be afraid of that?

I have since read everything that Brene Brown has written.  I have watched her special on Netflix.  I hope I can see her talk in person.

But after I watched that initial Ted Talk, I felt free to feel vulnerable. The biggest piece I got was that you can’t be vulnerable without courage.

I have felt shame in life.  I have never felt good enough.  I was never smart enough, pretty enough, or thin enough.  Shame caused me to build walls and Brene has helped me tear some down.  I am still working on others though.

Guilt and apathy are definitely emotions I have dealt with.  Survivors guilt is real.

Grief…more than half this blog is about grief.  I don’t think I need to prove it’s real.

Then we get to fear.

While one can cause a person to feel shame or guilt, I feel like fear is easily manipulated by other people.  People can incite fear in you.

Heck, some of your fears may not actually be your fears.  You may have learned those fears.

Another question to ask is if someone wants you to be fearful, especially if they gain from you being fearful.  Maybe you have a friend who tears you down to lower your self confidence and that makes you fearful to take chances in your life.  Your friend may want to keep you down because they are afraid you will make other friends or that you may outshine them.  I don’t know.  Really, if your friend does that, you probably need a new friend.

It’s okay to feel fear from time to time but is fear taking over your life?

So if you feel like you are playing into the feeling of fear, it might be a good idea (just a suggestion) to try to understand why you are afraid and see if it’s something that can be addressed and rectified.   Especially, because fear is keeping you from being the best version of you.  We all deserve to at our best.

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